Omegle Fail

This post is over 16 years old and may contain information that is incorrect, outdated, or no longer relevant.
My views and opinions can change, and those that are expressed in this post may not necessarily reflect the ones I hold today.
 

Chatting on Omegle gives me confidence in the future of humanity.

     

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: Hey

You: I have a gun in my hand and am about to shoot myself in the head. Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t commit suicide right now.

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Start a new conversation or send us feedback.

Was this conversation great? Share the log on Facebook or download it!

 

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The Epic Tale of Little Ian

This post is over 16 years old and may contain information that is incorrect, outdated, or no longer relevant.
My views and opinions can change, and those that are expressed in this post may not necessarily reflect the ones I hold today.
 

Once upon a time, there was a boy named Little Ian. He lived a few minutes away from Adam Parkzer, and they rode the same bus to school.

One day, Little Ian missed the bus. Fortunately, the bus route is organized so that the bus ends up passing Little Ian’s bus stop twice, once at the scheduled time and once about ten minutes later. Unfortunately, Little Ian also missed the second pass, which essentially meant that he missed the bus. But Little Ian wasn’t going to give up there. Little Ian had a plan.

Little Ian went back to his house and grabbed his bike. He hopped on with his backpack and started pedaling as fast as he could. His plan: to catch up to the bus and get on it at all costs. Little Ian knew that he would succeed.

Lucky for Little Ian, the bus route also included a stop in an out-of-the-way location to pick up a girl, who we will refer to by using her initials, CW. Out of all honesty, picking her up is an utter waste of time, and takes an extra one minute out of everyone’s lives when she could simply walk for a few hundred meters and not make the bus have to drive into an isolated area, then make a u-turn and retrace its tracks. But obviously, Miss CW is fragile and we must pick her up directly in front of her house, or else she might break in half. And also, the extra wasted minute gave Little Ian another opportunity to catch up.

Little Ian could see the bus in his sight. The massive yellow motor vehicle was coming to a slow halt at a stop sign. Little Ian vigorously motioned to catch the attention of the bus driver. He did it. He had succeeded. Little Ian proudly hoisted his bike over his shoulders and stepped on the bus. He walked in half-way of the length of the bus and placed his bike down. He proudly seated himself in the seat adjacent to Miss CW and put on a ear-to-ear smile.

Meanwhile, Miss CW gave disgusted looks to Little Ian.

As another school day passed, it was time to go back home. Little Ian, however, had a tiny problem. The bus driver wouldn’t let him bring his bike back on the bus, and told him that he would have to ride his bike back home. With no other choice, Little Ian went to his bike and started cycling home.

The end.

Yep, that story’s 100% factual and it happened today. I’m interested to know what happened to him. If he got hit by a car or got eaten by a hyena and died on the way back home, I think the bus driver has some lawsuits coming her way.

Obviously, some of you are saying, "Since when did you have a soft spot for little boys?" The thing is, the bus leaves my school at 3:00 PM, and it’s about 3:24 PM when I get back home. Of course, there’s a few stops before my stop, and it takes about a minute for me to walk from my bus stop to my house. But still, that would average out to anywhere between 15 and 20 minutes for the bus to bring me back home. Imagine how long it would take to travel that distance on a bike, especially seeing how hilly the roads are near where I live. Little Ian’s probably not even going to make it back in time for supper.

 

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April Fool’s 2010

This post is over 16 years old and may contain information that is incorrect, outdated, or no longer relevant.
My views and opinions can change, and those that are expressed in this post may not necessarily reflect the ones I hold today.
 

What a productive day. I vacuumed the house, organized my office, finished my laundry, cleaned out the garage, made new advertisements for our business (33% more drying time free at our laundromat, by the way), did some grocery shopping, and even got my hair cut. Meanwhile, one of my buddies had a plan.

"We regret to inform you that Adam Parkzer has died in a car collision and will no longer be able to main­tain his website. We apologize for any inconvenience this may cause."

Does that look familiar? It should if you visited the home page of my website at all earlier today.

I handed all my instant messaging accounts over to one of my friends today, who prefers to remain anonymous. He played the role of a detective named Kurt Abernathy who was investigating my death. I think this whole situation is better explained by giving the highlight instant message conversations that he had today. The messages my friend sent will be marked by Parkzer, and all other people will be marked as Anonymous. Please note that conversations may be offensive.

Anonymous: OMG GUESS WHAT
Parkzer: Hello, I apologize but Adam is not available at the moment.
Anonymous: WHY NOT?
Anonymous: sorry caps
Parkzer: My name is Kurt Abernathy, I am a detective currently doing investigations regarding the hit-and-run car collision that resulted in the death of Adam Parkzer.
Anonymous: LOLWUT?
Anonymous: asshole, i actually believed u for a while
Parkzer: I understand that it can be difficult accepting the death of a close friend. May I ask you a few general questions about Adam?
Anonymous: wtf r u talking about
Parkzer: Let me know if you prefer not to be questioned. Your contribution will only help in finding justice for Adam Parkzer.
Anonymous: whoever the fuck u are, gtfo
Anonymous: or show tits
Anonymous: jk
Anonymous: sort of
Anonymous: never mind fuck off

Here’s one from a family member:

Anonymous: hey Adam
Parkzer: Hello, I apologize but Adam is not available at the moment. My name is Kurt Abernathy, I am a detective currently doing investigations regarding the hit-and-run car collision that resulted in the death of Adam Parkzer.
Anonymous: OHSHIT
Anonymous: WHY THE HELL AM I ALWAYS THE LAST ONE TO BE TOLD ABOUT STUFF LIKE THIS
Anonymous has signed off.

She signed back on a short while later to confront Kurt:

Anonymous: HEY FUCKER
Anonymous: WHOEVER THE FUCK YOU ARE, YOU BETTER GET THE FUCK OFF ADAM’S COMPUTER
Anonymous: BEFORE YOU GET ANAL RAPED
Anonymous: I JUST ASKED HIS MOM AND SHE FLIPPED SHIT AND HAD TO CALL HIM LIKE 23947234 TIMES FOR HIM TO PICK UP
Anonymous has signed off.

Here’s someone that knew right away because of special circumstances:

Anonymous: hey I have a question
Parkzer: Hello, my name is Kurt Abernathy, I am a detective currently doing investigations regarding the hit-and-run car collision that resulted in the death of Adam Parkzer.
Anonymous: stop trying to april fools me you idiot
Anonymous: I just saw you at sams club you fucknut

Here’s one from a little bastard:

Anonymous: hey can you help me
Parkzer: Hello, my name is Kurt Abernathy, I am a detective currently doing investigations regarding the hit-and-run car collision that resulted in the death of Adam Parkzer.
Anonymous: he died?
Anonymous: holy shit thats so cool
Anonymous: i wanted him to die anyway, all i do is use him to get help on my homework
Anonymous: wait, shit, i shouldntve said that
Anonymous: this is you, isnt it
Parkzer: I understand that it can be difficult accepting the death of a close friend. May I ask you a few general questions about Adam?
Anonymous: i have a bad feeling about this

Sadly, most people seemed to know right away it was an April Fool’s joke, though:

Anonymous: hey
Parkzer: Hello, I apologize but Adam is not available at the moment. My name is Kurt Abernathy, I am a detective currently doing investigations regarding the hit-and-run car collision that resulted in the death of Adam Parkzer.
Anonymous: lol nice april fools joke
Parkzer: I regret to inform you that this is not a joke. The timing of this incident makes it extremely difficult for me to conduct investigations, and I request for your full cooperation with this matter.
Anonymous: hahahaha
Parkzer: May I ask you some general questions regarding your relationship and communications with Adam Parkzer?
Anonymous: lolololol
Anonymous: hahahahaha
Anonymous: hahahaa
Anonymous: hahaha
Anonymous: haa
Anonymous: ha.
Parkzer: Thank you for your contributions; however, due to circumstances, I believe we no longer need any additional information from you.
Anonymous: too sexy for my shooorts

And here’s one from a poor person:

Anonymous: hey
Anonymous: wassup
Parkzer: Hello, I apologize but Adam is not available at the moment. My name is Kurt Abernathy, I am a detective currently doing investigations regarding the hit-and-run car collision that resulted in the death of Adam Parkzer.
Anonymous: shiiiit
Anonymous: thats horible
Anonymous: wait
Anonymous: does that mean i can keep the 2$ he lent me last week

Soon, the news of my "death" spread and people started messing around with my buddy:

Anonymous: ADAM COMMITTED SUICIDE
Anonymous: I SWEAR
Anonymous: I SAW HIM
Anonymous: THE WHOLE HIT AND RUN WAS A SETUP
Anonymous: HE DID IT ON PURPOSE

And some were overdramatic:

Anonymous: Hey, I heard that you’re doing investigations
Anonymous: I just wanted to let you know that we all loved him very much
Anonymous: More than anyone else in the world
Anonymous: And we would give him blow jobs if he ever wanted one
Anonymous: Because we just love him that much
Anonymous: Even though we’re guys
Anonymous: No homo

Some tried to get smart:

Anonymous: So when did this happen?
Parkzer: The collision happened at 5:02 AM this morning, United States Central time.
Anonymous: Okay, well, the ghost of Adam Parkzer must be updating his twitter page then.
Parkzer: We were already alerted about that Twitter post. We have concluded that Adam Parkzer has a script that regularly advertises automatically on his Twitter profile.

Another instance of intelligence:

Parkzer: Are you willing to cooperate with our investigations?
Anonymous: sure, but first, can I have your badge number?
Parkzer: I apologize, but I regret to inform you that I cannot reveal that information over electronic communications. If you require any additional information about my identity, please call our village hall at 1-847-639-0003.

Stupid idiot gave him the real number of the village hall. If he had called it, I could’ve gotten in a fair a­mount of trouble. -__- Moving on, some just got furious:

Anonymous: Are you unable to perform your job without consuting people from 500 miles away?
Parkzer: Sir, I AM performing my job BY consulting people from 500 miles away.

And some got annoyed, and decided to be annoying in return:

Anonymous: What is the point of life?
Anonymous: What is reality?
Parkzer: Thank you for your contribution to our investigation, that is all that we need from you at this time.
Anonymous: Does reality exist?
Anonymous: How much of reality do we know?
Anonymous: Is everybody’s reality different?

One person completely overlooked the part of the conversation when my friend said it was a hit-and-run car collision, and started giving suggestions on how the death could have occurred:

Anonymous: so when did this happen again?
Parkzer: The collision happened at 5:02 AM this morning, United States Central time.
Anonymous: maybe he choked on his cereal
Anonymous: or on his toast
Anonymous: while eating breakfast

I also learned something new about someone – that they’re quite nosy:

Anonymous: *poke*
Parkzer: Hello, I apologize but Adam is not available at the moment. My name is Kurt Abernathy, I am a detective currently doing investigations regarding the hit-and-run car collision that resulted in the death of Adam Parkzer.
Anonymous: howd you get his aim password?
Anonymous: wait
Anonymous: do you happen to have the password for his facebook account?
Parkzer: I apologize, but we cannot distribute such information. Why do you ask for his login credentials?
Anonymous: because i think him and my best friend have something goin on
Anonymous: wait
Anonymous: crap
Anonymous: shit
Anonymous: fuck
Anonymous: im so stupid
Anonymous: how the fuck did you just fool me like that
Anonymous: fucking ninja
Anonymous: i hate you

All in all, it was an enjoyable experience for me. I learned quite a bit about the people I talk with everyday, and freaked out some people that IMed me today for the first time. I know that claiming someone’s death isn’t a very original April Fool’s joke, but I’m glad that I still got some entertaining results out of it. :D

 

—§—

 

A Day in the Life of Adam Parkzer

This post is over 16 years old and may contain information that is incorrect, outdated, or no longer relevant.
My views and opinions can change, and those that are expressed in this post may not necessarily reflect the ones I hold today.
 

A day in the life of Adam Parkzer.

I wake up, get ready, and I’m out the door in about eight minutes. I’m on the bus, 6:17 AM, and it’s pitch black outside. I have to turn the flash on for anything to appear. The two people in the picture were blinded by it and said they couldn’t see for half a minute after I took the picture.

We arrive at school and I go to the library, about 7:00 AM. Some people are studying while others are touching their crotch.

At around 7:16 AM, just before classes are about to begin, one of my friends decides to draw a smiley face on my hand in red cray-pas and take a picture of it.

7:25 AM, time for Sociology. Didn’t get a chance to take any pictures, we were in the computer lab doing IQ tests.

Second period already, World Literature teacher was outlining literary concepts and recurring themes on the dry-erase board. Time check: 8:38 AM.

Then he went to the other side of the room and started discussion.

Break time, 9:14 AM. Forty-five minutes to do my homework. Correction: Forty-five minutes to talk to the person sitting next to me (whose arm is visible in the picture) and listen to her weird but awesome stories.

No pictures from Health class. I’m surrounded by chaotic, unruly sophomores everyday in that class because I didn’t take the class when I was supposed to as a sophomore, and now I have to take it as a senior. I didn’t even want to take my camera out in case one of them tried to nibble on it. Out of the 30 or so people in there, I only talk to about three or four of them (including the teacher).

Lunch break, 10:47 AM. We went to Bocci’s pizza place. Their pizza slices are about the size of a fast food restaurant tray (literally). Didn’t have time to take pictures of eating, we had to swallow the pizza as fast as possible and get out so we wouldn’t be late.

No pictures from Spanish class, we’re always so busy that I don’t even have time to take a deep breath in that class.

Half-way through World History class, 12:44 PM. I was creeping on the other side of the room from my corner. There’s four other girls that sit near the door that I’m sure would’ve loved to be in the picture, but they happened to be in front of the class presenting their project when I took the picture.

Last period of the day, 2:29 PM. In the library again.

3:04 PM, riding the bus back home. The Asian guy in the picture looks like he’s about to sneeze.

Walking back to my house from the bus stop, 3:23 PM. I couldn’t hold my camera steady enough because I was walking with such incredible velocity.

Finally back in my house. Time check: 3:29 PM. Came up to my office and emptied my pockets of my phone, wallet, pens, and coins.

A few doors down into my bedroom to change into more comfortable clothes.

Time to get to work! The stupid lighting adjustment on my camera doesn’t work very well so a lighted room with a laptop screen in the picture makes the darker hallway look like a black hole.

Time for a break, it’s only 5:56 PM and it’s already pitch black outside. Where’d my day go?

Unwanted phone distraction, 6:21 PM. For the fifth time, no, I am not interested in donating to your charity.

Done with dinner. Time check: 9:12 PM. Time to answer my share of x10Hosting support tickets.

Time check: 10:34 PM. Even though my day usually doesn’t end until 12 to 1 AM, I’m going to end my photographs here. Maybe I should do this more often, it was actually somewhat fun. Hopefully, this helped some of my stalkers find out what I do in a day.

 

—§—

 

The Rise and Fall of a Copyright Infringer

This post is over 16 years old and may contain information that is incorrect, outdated, or no longer relevant.
My views and opinions can change, and those that are expressed in this post may not necessarily reflect the ones I hold today.
 

We all know those malicious people, those evil ones that lurk around the internet looking for warez. With illegal, copyrighted material readily available through torrents and other means of free downloads, copy­right infringement has become a massive problem. Between the five-day period of July 13-18, 2009, I experienced a unique copyright infringer, one stationed in the depths of the United Kingdom. It all began one day like this…

loveispoison:

hello

please review my website thanks

Thewebsite is for all those people that find it more convenient to bother you with their question rather than google it for themselves.

http://let-me-google-it-for-you.co.cc/

When I visited the URL, I noticed that it was a clone of Let Me Google That For You, and was thus violating the copyright of LMGTFY, LLC. I gave my opinion in the discussion, and got a response.

adamparkzer:

So just curious, what’s the point of having a clone of that site when we can just use http://letmegooglethatforyou.com/?

loveispoison:

what the point of google video or daily motion or other website that are the same?

adamparkzer:

You’re not getting my point.

There’s Youtube, Daily Motion, Hulu, and multiple other video sites because video websites are used with high frequency, and these websites are competitors. They program their own material from scratch, and they have their own specialties and features.

Your clone, on the other hand, is just stealing the work of someone else. I’m on the verge of wondering if this is even legal, as you’re plagiarizing someone else’s code and script.

If you want to use the "google video or daily motion" analogy, then think of it this way: It’s fine to have a Google Video and Daily Motion, but do we really need two Daily Motions?

Meanwhile, I wasn’t just sitting there waiting for responses from loveispoison, now obviously identified as our copyright infringer. Behind the scenes, I had already contacted the owners of LMGTFY, and received a response the next day. It went as follows:

Ryan of LMGTFY, LLC:

Adam,

Thanks for the notice. Yes, that site is in direct copyright violation of our company, LMGTFY, LLC.

It never ceases to amaze us how blatantly stupid and immoral some people are. This isn’t the first time we’ve been outright plagiarized. The only good thing for us is that we have millions of visitors per month, where these rip-offs rarely top a few dozen.

I’d post a reply on the forum, but I’m restricted because my forum account isn’t activated yet.

-Ryan and Jim

http://twitter.com/rmm5t
http://twitter.com/coderifous

P.S. Check out our live search stream: http://live.lmgtfy.com

After we got Ryan’s registration and activation issue settled on the x10Forums, he went ahead and made a post on the forum thread that this all this was developing on.

rmm5t:

loveispoison, Hi. This is one of the owners of LMGTFY, LLC. You are in direct violation of our copyright. In addition, outright copying code and rebranding it as your own just isn’t cool. Be original. Be yourself. Stealing other people’s ideas (and implementations) just makes you look like a fool.

As this was happening, loveispoison went ahead and created another thread on the forums, this time titled "check this out – Google Music Search tottaly legal." This was the post:

loveispoison:

copy and paste the code into your browser and see what happens

Code removed

tested And Working 100 % Guaranteed…………!! biggrin

Obviously, I couldn’t resist responding to it. The following was my response, then a forum administrator posting afterwards.

adamparkzer:

So essentially, it’s a script for prompting input, plugging it into a giant string to search for on Google, then hoping you can find a website that illegally offers the song for free?

Man, you’re on a roll with this copyright infringement stuff. First you steal LMGTFY’s scripts, and now you’re helping people find illegal ways to download songs by misusing a search engine?

David:

Referencing to above post by adamparkzer

Wow, someone who actually has a clue, you get a cookie!

lockd

With that, the thread was closed to prevent further responses, and the code was removed. Not long afterward, a THIRD incident came up.

loveispoison:

hi all

just finished this new site been working on the design for some time know its done but still needs some work done please review and if you can let me know if something is wrong or or ad something new thanks for reading know time to visit the website

http://get-vid.co.cc/index.php

Someone a bit quicker than me already noticed that his new site was again a site clone, and voiced is opinion. Additionally, after reading loveispoison‘s post, this is where I flipped.

sourfacedcyclop:

Err… whats the point. Looking at the source code, it just looks like you copied and pasted from
http://www.downloadyoutubevideos.com/

adamparkzer:

LISTEN. I AM BEING SERIOUS.

This is the THIRD incident in the past few days I can name off the top of my head of you infringing copyright.

(1) You stole LetMeGoogleThatForYou’s copyrighted code.
(2) You created a script to help people misuse search engines and acquire illegal music.
(3) You stole DownloadYoutubeVideo’s copyrighted code.

I already notified Let Me Google That For You’s owner, Ryan McGeary, and he was nice enough to just tell you that you’re directly violating their copyright and he didn’t take action.

I will be immediately notifying the owners of DownloadYoutubeVideos.com for copyright infringement. What they choose to do is up to them. If this continues, I will have personal discussion(s) with admin(s) so they will take disciplinary action against your account.

Although I said "If this continues," I didn’t wait for it to continue. Three incidents were more than enough; immediately after finishing that post, I started instant messaging a few moderators and administrators that I saw more frequently around the forums, or that had helped me out in the past. The next morning, loveispoison gave us a response.

loveispoison:

Referencing to above post by sourfacedcyclop

wtf copied my ass gtfo2

Referencing to above post by adamparkzer

hahaha what da hell is wrong wit ya kido let me worry about that not you dumbhead tell me something what if i copy your site what your gona do huh nothing hehe so buzz of and leave me alone thefinger but i dont copy others website and claim it as my own and yes i do copy some sites but for learning purposses only

As my friend Garrett said, "Go copy Windows for ‘learning purposes’ and see what happens." After his post, there were a few other responses made, and an argument broke out. An administrator that I talked with the previous day closed the thread before further flaming occurred.

Christopher:

Closing this before it goes too far

In the process of closing the thread, Administrator Christopher also shut down Get-Vid.co.cc, which was hosted on x10Hosting servers. But there was still the LMGTFY clone out. I couldn’t stop here.

LMGTFY Copyright

After filing an abuse report at 000WebHost.com’s website, I got a prompt response from a staff member notifying me that the website in question had been taken down. I let Ryan of LMGTFY know about my success, and he replied:

Ryan of LMGTFY, LLC:

Adam,

Thanks for the follow-through. We really appreciate it.

http://twitter.com/lmgtfy/status/2713134670

You rock,
-Ryan and Jim

All of loveispoison‘s illegal sites had been shut down. I thought I was done. I thought it was going to end there. Then I got a private message.

loveispoison:

well if you think ur who does not let go then you dont know me im worst then you i will copy your site and reup my website and make your life a hell that i swear on the devil thefinger and pormise you this corss my heart make your life a hell dont think this is a joke i will buy a hosting some were were yo thefinger u cant **** with any 1 even tell the host to shut me down but they wont shut me down and i know were thefinger

After shooting an instant message to Christopher and forwarding the private message onto him, we also came across a new thread posted in the Free Hosting Support area.

loveispoison:

let me begin i have to websites and yhe links are on my sig but there is 2 members who are tottaly racist so i made a post to review my website review my new website please

as you can see they are saying that i was copying other website so i wasnt u copying others and the website let me google it for you is a free script and they made a fake mad user as the real owner and said im the owner huh and my other website get-vid.co.cc it was suspended in there bcoz i was violating youtube.com temrs cmon there are 1000s of youtbe downloaders online and who is saing its ilegal so if you guys dont want me here then fine thanks and these are the user here who i dont like and are racist %100

check here

http://forums.x10hosting.com/members…itor_messaging

these guys below
sourfacedcyclop
adamparkzer

so if you still dont want me here then fine i leave but one thing i promise i will make those guys life a hell

This is when I noticed that loveispoison doesn’t know what racist means. This is also when Christopher laid down the hammer. loveispoison immediately received a ban from x10Hosting Forums. This is where we stand now.

 

—§—

 

The Fourth Dimension: A Scientific Approach to Christianity

This post is over 17 years old and may contain information that is incorrect, outdated, or no longer relevant.
My views and opinions can change, and those that are expressed in this post may not necessarily reflect the ones I hold today.
 

These articles were originally published on Blogger, then later used for an Advanced Placement English Language and Composition course paper.

 

 

The Fourth Dimension, Part I: Intro to Mario World

April 12, 2009

A few days ago, I revealed that I would be writing my AP English Language and Composition final paper on the fourth dimension and how it can scientifically explain the theories of religion, Christianity in particular. To help me organize my thoughts and better prove my point, I have chosen to make a series called The Fourth Dimension: A Scientific Approach to Christianity. In this collection, I will partition the concepts I will be covering in my paper and introduce them in segments. All comments will be read and considered thoroughly and seriously, no matter how one-sided or arrogant they may be. I encourage you to share your views so I can do better on my paper, but more importantly, pinpoint flaws and solidify my theory.

So to start off, I am going to give some background information for the people who approach my theory with no basic knowledge of the dimensions whatsoever. Before I give any other information, I’m going to reveal the most vital fact needed to understand anything I’m talking about: the fourth dimension is time, and beings in the fourth dimension can control it at will. Confusing? Well, while researching in class to complete my topic proposal assignment, I found a source with an excellent analogy between the second and third dimensions and the third to fourth dimensions, which will help you quite a bit.

Back in the day, when we had our non-portable Nintendo gaming systems, there was a famous game called Mario Brothers. The plot was set in a seemingly never-ending world, with fire-spitting enemies after you from every corner. But, the most important aspect of Mario we’re going to use is that the entire game was set in a two-dimensional world.

If a killer Goomba started sliding toward Mario, he could do only one of four things (actually it’s three, but I’m going to say four just for this example’s sake): move forward and toward the Goomba, which probably isn’t the best idea; move backward and away from the Goomba, and be Chicken Mario; jump and go above the Goomba, to safely evade it; or dig and go below the Goomba, which we all know isn’t possible unless there was some secret key combination to whip out a shovel from Mario’s back pocket. Note that you cannot make Mario step aside and let him watch the Goomba walk right past his body, because Mario is not in the third dimension.

But, what if there was a killer Goomba coming down your street right now, headed towards you head-on? You could do all the things Mario can do to avoid it: move forward, move backward, jump over it, or dig a tunnel below it. But, you can also do two more things: move to the right, and move to the left. Note that you cannot control time and make the Goomba walk down the street at a different time, because you are not in the fourth dimension. Using this concept, I will start tomorrow by making some comparisons between our lives and Mario’s life.

 

 

The Fourth Dimension, Part II: Mario World Analogies

April 13, 2009

Yesterday, I described the differences between the second and third dimensions. Today, I’ll be starting off with some simple analogies to compare objects in a two-dimensional world to objects in a three-dimensional world.

Left and Right is to the Second Dimension as Past and Future is to the Third Dimension.

Say that Mario was moving along one day when he encountered a Koopa Troopa. For some reason, they decided to talk about how they came to be, Mario claims that he knows; Mario claims that there is a creator. After the Koopa gets skeptical and asks Mario to point to where their creator is, Mario replies that he can’t, even though the creator is to the right of him, and the directions right and left exist. This is similar to the concept that our creator is located somewhere, but we cannot point to him. Existing in the fourth dimension, we are unable to point to the past or future, even though we know they exist.

You are to the Second Dimension as God is to the Third Dimension

In the conversation mentioned above, Mario states that there is a creator. Although we did not literally create the game, we created the world by placing the game pack into our gaming system and powering on the gaming system to make Mario World appear on our television screen. This is a similar situation with the creator of our world. Similar to how we are able to observe and control what is happening in Mario World, our creator, or God, as Christianity calls it, is able to observe and control what is happening in the third dimension. We are the ruler of Mario World; our creator is the ruler of the third dimension. Note: from now on, "God" will be referenced to as the Creator.

Mario is to the Second Dimension as Jesus is to the Third Dimension

While we are playing Mario World, we are basically placing ourselves into the second dimension and determining what will happen next. However, if we literally placed our bodies into the second dimension, we would appear in cross sections, because only one slice of the depth of our bodies can be perceived at a time. Thus, we have Mario, whom we control with a gaming controller, to do what we want to do in the second dimension. This is similar to how the Creator placed Jesus, as the Christians call him, onto this world. The Creator was unable to enter the third dimension in a perceivable method, so he created a three-dimensional being that he could control like we control Mario.

This brief overview is it for today, please leave any opinions and/or discrepancies you observed while reading my blog post.

 

 

The Fourth Dimension, Part III: What?

April 18, 2009

In the past two parts, I presented examples and connections among the second, third, and fourth dimensions for an easy, immediate grasp of the concept as a whole. Now that you have a good picture in your mind of the fundamentals, I thought it would be a good time to explain the scientific definitions of the dimensions.

The word "dimension" is defined by the Microsoft Encarta College Dictionary as "a level of consciousness, existence, or reality." In the world we live in today, there exist three dimensions.

Firstly, there is dimension zero. Objects in the zeroth dimension have highly limited characteristics; everything existing in the zeroth dimension exists as a point. When you think back to your early schooling years when you took geometry, you should have a distinct memory of plotting an endless number of points on a Cartesian coordinate graph. Those dots you drew represented a single point on the graph, existing in the zeroth dimension.

Next, there is dimension one. Objects in the first dimension are lines that can have varying lengths. Going back to geometry class, after you plotted two points on your paper, you whipped out your ruler and drew a line connecting them. Depending on how far apart the two points are, your line could be short or long. Thus, the first dimension has one characteristic: length.

Moving on, there is dimension two. Objects in the second dimension are planes that can have varying area. Once again, referencing to geometry class, after completing your line, you could draw another point non-collinear in respect to the two points you originally had and connect both ends of your line segment to this new point. The space enclosed inside the three lines is what we call a triangle, and exists in the second dimension. Depending on how far away the new point was to the line you had, the encased plane could have high or low area. Thus, the second dimension has two characteristics: length and width, which combine to form area.

Furthermore, there is dimension three. Objects in the third dimension are solids with varying volume. If you had six sheets of paper and taped them together so every side of every sheet had another sheet attached to it, you would make a prism. The space enclosed inside the prism exists in the third dimension. Depending on how large the sheets of paper were, the created solid could have large or small volume. Thus, the third dimension has three characteristics: length, width, and depth, which combine to form volume.

Finally, there is dimension four. Objects in the fourth dimension are things with varying age. if you create the prism out of paper mentioned above and set it on your desk, it will soon get discolored by the sun, crushed and malformed, water damaged by potential liquid spills, and tattered by natural decomposition. Depending on the conditions of its environment, the life of the prism could be shorter or longer. Thus, the fourth dimension has four characteristics: length, width, depth, and time, which combine to form a life cycle.

That’s it for today. As always, all opinions are requested and welcome.

 

 

The Fourth Dimension, Part IV: Sidetrack to the Fifth Dimension

April 19, 2009

Yesterday, I gave definitions and representations of dimensions zero through four. Taking a break from the central theme, I decided to do a quick segment about the fifth dimension.

As you are living in the third dimension, you are living through the fourth dimension. You are unable to control it, but time ticks on, and the fourth dimension ticks on with it. Objects existing in the fourth dimension are able to alter time at will, but you cannot because you are dimensionally inferior.

This can be exemplified by a small demonstration you can do at home. Cut out a strip of paper. Twist one end 180 degrees so there is a half loop in the paper. Then, without further twisting the paper, bend the edges around and toward each other and tape them together. Finally, take a pencil, put the tip of the pencil anywhere on the body of the strip of paper, and start drawing. Keep drawing, and your line will twist and turn around the paper. If this line had been the trail of a one-dimensional object, from the first dimension’s viewpoint, they are going in a straight line and only progressing in one dimension. However, from the third dimension’s viewpoint, it is obvious that the line has been traveling in and out of multiple depths of the third dimension.

So what exactly is the fifth dimension? The fifth dimension is a split of the fourth dimension. The easiest way to understand the fifth dimension is to say that every time we make a choice on what to do in life, we change our location in the fifth dimension. This is similar to how every time the one-dimensional object chose to move forward on the strip of paper, its location in the second and third dimensions changed without it being aware of it. If a five-dimensional being was watching us from the fifth dimension, they would see something along the lines of us completing a maze. The choices that we can make are different forks in the maze, and us following through with the choices are like walking down the straight sections of the maze.

That’s all for the fifth dimension, we’ll go back to the fourth dimension and find out how the world came to be in the next part of this series.

 

 

The Fourth Dimension, Part V: In The Beginning

April 22, 2009

According to the Bible, God said something along the lines of "Let there be light," and the world was created. However, in my analogies, I said that you were similar to God in the way that you are able to create Mario World by powering on your gaming system. So how exactly does this work, and how exactly did our third dimension world come to be?

When you play Mario World, you create the two-dimensional world with a purpose – for your entertainment. You enjoy playing games on your Nintendo gaming system, so you create your two-dimensional world to have some fun. The way the third dimension was created is somewhat similar. The Creator created the three-dimensional world for his entertainment. He wanted to have some fun, but he did so in a way that he could control everything that occurred in the world he created. We are unable to defeat and overpower our Creator because he has the power of the fourth dimension over us. So the "Let there be light"? It’s possible that our Creator said that when he created our three-dimensional world, but it’s just as random as us saying "Let there be light" when turning on our gaming systems.

So this brings up the idea of multiple worlds existing. It’s very possible that you turn on your Nintendo gaming system to play Mario at the same time as your neighbor does, and two different two-dimensional worlds exist at the same time. On a larger scale, it’s possible that multiple four-dimensional beings have created multiple three-dimensional worlds at the same time. Going back to Mario World, it’s possible that we are at different progressions in the game than our neighbors. For example, we may have almost reached the end of the game, while our neighbor just started playing. This can be compared to the progression of the advancement of technology in the three-dimensional worlds, and is a justification for the existence of aliens. Aliens are merely three-dimensional beings that belong in a different three-dimensional world owned by a different four-dimensional being. They have just happened to have greater technological advancements than us, and are capable of moving from one three-dimensional world from another.

In the next section, we’ll explore more about moving from one dimension to another.

 

 

The Fourth Dimension, Part VI: Trip to the Second Dimension

April 26, 2009

What would happen if we entered the second dimension? Essentially, someone in the second dimension would see us as cross sections. Infinitely small slices of our bodies would appear at a time in the second dimension. This can be imagined by guessing what it would be like if we were able to push our bodies through a piece of paper. What someone drawn on the piece of paper would see of our bodies would be similar to what we would look like in the second dimension. If we stuck our arm through the paper, we would start out as a small circle, then get larger and larger as our arm gets thicker and thicker.

So, what would happen if our Creator, a four-dimensional being, entered the third dimension? Similar to how second-dimensional beings see cross sections of our depth, we would see cross sections of our Creator’s time, or age. So essentially, we would see the Creator in one point of his life. Similar to how we can alter the cross section of ourselves the two-dimensional beings can see by simply moving our arm deeper in or further out of the piece of paper, the Creator can change the age of his existence we see by simply moving deeper into the past or further into the future.

This method of entering another dimension isn’t very effective though, especially if we wanted to communicate to the two-dimensional beings. When we stick our arm through the piece of paper, first of all, it’ll be quite difficult to keep it steady. Our arm will constantly be moving slightly in or slightly out, no matter how hard we try to keep it still. Thus, our cross-section will constantly be changing, and the two-dimensional beings will be more interested in seeing the magical changing object more than listening to what we have to say. This can be applied to the fourth dimension. If our Creator chose to enter the third dimension to talk to us, he would have difficulty maintaining a constant age. He would be changing from an infant to an elder, and we would be more interested in his changing age more than what he has to say to us.

This is where Jesus, as the Bible calls him, comes along. If we wanted to effectively communicate to the second dimension, we could easily create another two-dimensional being to send messages for us. We would be able to control the two-dimensional being entirely, and not have difficulty keeping it in a constant depth because the two-dimensional being doesn’t have depth. Our Creator did the same with what the Bible calls Jesus. To effectively communicate to us about his existence and what he wishes for us to do, the Creator created his own three-dimensional being to control himself and communicate to us with.

In the next section, I’ll be explaining what four-dimensional beings would be depicted as in the third dimension, if they were ever to be present in the third dimension.

 

 

The Fourth Dimension, Part VII: The Final Paper

May 26, 2009

I’m finally finished with my final paper, and it was due today. I made it into an Adobe PDF file, and it is now available for download.

Click here to download my final paper.

Overall, the paper was a compilation of the multiple posts that I made in this blog, in a more organized manner. Leaving out the sidetracks to the fifth dimension, these small snippets of writing that I did on the blog greatly aided me in structuring my paper well. A majority of the different aspects covered in the blog posts were placed in my paper, with a few additional ones that I thought up of on the fly.

I believe the biggest flaw in this paper is the use and integration of external sources. There was a required minimum of eight sources, but in previous papers I’ve written that had no required minimum quantity of sources, I usually had a full page of references. I thought this wouldn’t be an issue in this paper as well, and apparently it was – I was struggling to find quality sources that I could place in my paper without making it too obvious that they were just placed in there because of the requirement. Because this paper was based greatly off my own thoughts and beliefs, I had difficulty finding others’ opinions that could tie in with my own. Ultimately, I ended up using poor quality references because there were no others that had sufficient connections with my topic.

All comments are welcome on my paper, and all suggestions on how to improve my writing can be placed in the comment area. Although this paper may not be one of my most entertaining pieces, all feedback is appreciated.

 

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