I know this may sound ridiculous, but my laptop has still not been repaired. When the technician came last time and failed to repair my laptop, he said that he would order a new motherboard for me, but I didn’t receive any contact from Dell about it, so I decided to chat with them to make sure that it was done. Here are some interesting excerpts from my chat conversation that took almost one hour to finish.

(05:34:17PM) Adam: Could you check to make sure that a motherboard was properly ordered for my system? A technician came to replace an LCD about two weeks ago but we realized that my laptop’s display problem was not a problem with the LCD, and he said that he would order a new motherboard so we could replace that, but I don’t think he did.

After waiting several minutes of waiting and verifying what machine I had, the support technician said:

(05:44:02PM) Saurabh: Adam, I apologize the dispatch for the motherboard has not been created. Please donot worry I will make the dispatch for the LCD and the motherboard now so that you donot face any issues.

(05:44:16PM) Adam: No, I don’t need another LCD. I already got a new LCD and got it replaced, but that wasn’t the problem. I just need a new motherboard, and possibly the cable that connects the upper screen area to the motherboard.

After another several minutes, we verified my address and phone number, and the chat support representative put in the request for a technician to come repair my laptop again. After getting that set up, I asked another question:

(05:51:32PM) Adam: I have one more question. This is the seventh or eighth time I’ve contacted chat support about this problem, and a technician has already been to my apartment twice before to attempt to fix this problem, so this is clearly a recurring problem. What is your return policy on products that have problems like this? Would I be able to get a Dell store credit so I can purchase an entirely different machine if this third repair still does not fully resolve the problem?

This is where mass chaos began. Instead of answering my question, he did everything possible to avoid it.

(05:54:07PM) Saurabh: Adam, I sincerely apologize for the past inconvenience. Please donot worry and be assured the issue will be fixed this time by the parts replacement. We will send all the required parts through the technician so that you donot face any issues further.

(05:54:40PM) Adam: I know, but in the case that this third repair still does not resolve the problem, would a return or exchange for a different Dell machine be an option?

(05:58:16PM) Saurabh: Adam, we will make sure that the correct parts are sent to you for the replacement so that you donot face any issues further. You will not have to come back again for the same issue.

(05:58:32PM) Adam: … You’re not answering my question. The first representative that I talked with for the first repair said the same thing that you’re saying now.

(06:06:15PM) Saurabh: Adam, we cannot promise the system exchange right now till the parts replacement are done to fix the issue but please donot worry the issue will be fixed after the parts replacement

(06:07:11PM) Adam: First of all, stop saying that the issue will be fixed after the replacement, because we all expected it to be fixed after the first repair but it didn’t work, and now we’re on the third repair. What are the conditions that make a product refund or exchange an option?

(06:17:31PM) Saurabh: I apologize for the delay. I really understand your concerns and apologize for the inconveniences caused to you. Please donot worry we will make sure that the system is fixed this time and if in case you face nay issues we will surely do the needful.

This is where I gave up on him.

(06:17:57PM) Adam: Are you even reading my questions, or are you just using canned responses and sending me random answers?

(06:18:17PM) Adam: The stuff you say is completely irrelevant to what I ask about 80% of the time. If you don’t know the answer, you could’ve just said “I don’t know” about 20 minutes ago and we could’ve all saved time.

(06:18:47PM) Adam: This is ridiculous, you’re wasting my life.

(06:18:56PM) Adam: Thanks for setting up the appointment for me, no thanks for not answering my questions.

(06:19:03PM) Adam: Have a nice day.

(06:19:05PM) Session Ended

So Far in 2011…

Number of Taco Bell tacos eaten: 10

Number of times I did my own laundry: 1